Hello,
my name is XXXX, and I have decided to embrace Islam
as my way of life..
However my girlfriend and soon to be wife has
embraced christianity for her way life and for our
two children..
I have no problem with her faith, but she always
wants me to go to church with them, and sometimes I
do to keep the peace. But I'm not sure how I should
handle this reguest after I have become a muslim and
have embraced Islam..
Can I still attend her church services's from time to
time? How do I handle this dilemma..
She seems to be supportive of my decision to embrace
Islam, but Like many others including myself. Untill
I did my own research and discovered this magnificent
way of life. She's a bit apprehensive..
Please guide me in the ways of Islam, so as not to
hurt our family relationship..
Thank you..
Praise be to Allaah.
First of all, you should
hasten to enter Islam, which is easy to do. An
explanation of what is involved may be found under
Question 114. (See also
Questions 122, 158 and 177).
Secondly, if this lady becomes a Muslim or one of the
People of the Book (Christian or Jewish), repents to
Allaah for the forbidden relationship, and remains chaste,
then it is permissible for you to marry her.
Thirdly, the children who were born to this woman outside
of marriage are not your children; they cannot take your
name and must take her name. However, this should not
prevent you from treating them kindly, taking care of
them and spending on them. In the future, you should try
to call them and their mother to Islaam.
Fourthly, going to her church and attending rituals of
kufr is not advisable, because of the possible negative
consequences. We advise you not to do that, but this
should not be any obstacle to your entering Islam. If you
were to say that it is a choice of either embracing Islam
and going to the church with her, or not embracing Islam
at all, we would definitely tell you to embrace Islam.
But we would like you to think of the meaning of these
two soorahs of the Qur'aan (interpretation of the
meanings):
"Say: He is Allaah, (the) One.
Allaah-us-Samad (The Self-Sufficient Master, Whom all
creatures need; He neither eats nor drinks).
He begets not nor was He begotten;
And there is none co-equal or comparable unto Him."
[al-Ikhlaas 112:1-4]
"Say: O Kaafiroon (disbelievers in Allaah, in His
Oneness, etc.)!
I worship not that which you worship,
Nor will you worship that which I worship.
And I shall not worship that which you are worshipping.
Nor will you worship that which I worship
To you be your religion, and to me my religion (Islaamic
monotheism)."
[al-Kaafiroon 109:1-6]
Finally I advise you, a wise man who is striving to make
the right choice, hasten to enter Islam and practise it:
Allaah will help you to overcome all obstacles. May
Allaah take care of you